As for me, I know of nothing else but miracles. - Walt Whitman

Thursday, August 16, 2012

Sometimes I Forget.....

Sometimes I forget where our twins came from. They just fit into our family so well, and sometimes it's easy to just assume that they've always been here. I forget about the heartbreak, the sadness, the poverty, the redemption. I forget about Ethiopia. Oh sure, the dire circumstances that you see stay with you for awhile, and you come home thinking that your life is forever changed. And it is, deep down inside. The amazing story is always there, in the back of your mind. But it doesn't take long to get back into your old, comfortable routine. Back to the way you've always done things, the way you've always lived. Back to the same selfishness. And Proverbs 24:12 comes to mind: "If thou sayest, Behold, we knew it not; doth not he that pondereth the heart consider it? And he that keepeth thy soul, doth not he know it? and shall not he render to every man according to his works?"

I don't want to forget. Please, God, don't let me forget.

Sometimes I forget that we are not a "normal-looking" family, until we go out in public or travel somewhere and everybody stares at us. Some people ask questions, some people make comments about how many kids we have, some people just stare, and others talk about us behind their hands. But that's ok - I just hope they can see a little bit of Jesus shining through when they look at us.

I don't want to forget to let my light shine and try to be an encouragement to at least one person every day.

Sometimes I forget that to whom much is given, much is required. I have been given much.

I don't want to forget that much is required of me.

Sometimes I forget that God knows best. He always has. He always will. You would think that I would certainly know that by now. But sometimes it's hard to let go and give everything over to Him. There have been times in my life when I've done things my way, only to find that I was wrong. Times when I thought I wanted something, but God didn't give it to me. And it has been for the best. Times when I didn't want something, yet God gave it to me anyway. And it has been perfect. So why is it so hard sometimes to trust and leave everything up to Him? My heart knows that I want what He wants for me, but my head sometimes forgets.

I don't want to forget to leave it all to Him. Everything. Always. 

Sometimes I forget that life is short. At this point, it sometimes seems like the days go on forever. That I still have plenty of time in this life to do what matters. But sometimes I imagine a rope that is stretched around the world many times. It seems to go on forever and ever, and you can't, never will, see the end of it. The very first inch of that rope represents our life here on this earth. And the rest is only the beginning of eternity. I need to make every second of this life matter, and store up my treasure in heaven instead of here on earth. That is what matters, after all.

I don't want to forget to number my days. And to make the most of them. 

Sometimes I forget that this earth is not my home. I am only passing through. I don't want to get too comfortable. But I don't want to get too upset, either, when hard things happen. When life seems unfair. When those I love get hurt. After all, Jesus told us that "...in the world ye shall have tribulation." (John 16:33) We are not exempt. In fact, we should expect it. This is a fallen world, after all. We need to forgive, just as He has forgiven us. And we are not to worry, because He has overcome the world. And we can rest in this promise.

Dear God, please help me to never forget.

4 comments:

  1. Wonderful post, Erica...and I couldn't agree more!

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  2. loved this! thanks for encouraging me!!
    praise God for His goodness!

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  3. Erica-beautifully written. We have yet to have our two home yet and we already are getting comments on the number of kids we have, on the diversity of our family. All without even having a single picture or time when all 7 are together. When we got back from Africa I DID so want my normal, my security, all the while feeling guilty that our children, left behind until our embassy date, didn't have this luxury. Have to remind myself that our faithful God does know the best and will provide. When I forget this, life can be hard, when I am faithful, there is comfort, strength and direction. Thanks for sharing.

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  4. Exactly what i needed to read tonight...thank you for sharing such a devoted heart for the Lord.

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